mighty forces

Antisocial media

Haven’t been around here very much, if at all. I’ve been posting what random thoughts I had on Facebook, because my group of Facebook friends has become larger than probably even my largest weblog audience, especially since the end of words mean things.

Not sure what to do here. But then, I’m still trying to figure out Twitter and Facebook and LinkedIn and Posterous and Foursquare all the rest – not just for myself, but also for my clients and my current employer. It’s a thicket. But we tend to forget how young all this media stuff is – it’s like trying to figure out the impact of the printed book when you’re friends with Gutenberg. Anyone who tells you they have the answer is bluffing.

Dark and light

At first I didn’t get Facebook – I thought it was just another way to waste time online. And while it is that, it’s so much more. To me, it’s a fascinating sociological experiment where millions of people gather and show off, indirectly, what makes them tick.

I like Facebook status updates especially, because rather than being a vehicle for “I just had soup” sort of life updates that no one (including the writer) would find interesting, they become a sort of personal performance art. What can I say that’s funny, interesting, witty, charming, smart?

It became clear early on that the range of emotions acceptable in a Facebook update message are limited, especially on the dark end of the scale. Being elated over a new job is acceptable, as long as you don’t dwell on it. Your friends might even join in with congratulations, if the mood struck them. But being depressed, angry, or upset? Frowned upon, if not openly mocked.

For a while I didn’t understand why this was. If this was an avenue for expression, why not the whole spectrum? But then I realized: negative emotions aren’t allowed to be openly expressed in “polite” American society at large either – so why would they be allowed on Facebook?

Of course, it can get tiring to hear your friends bitch and moan about their problems in real life. But I think it goes beyond that – to a denial of those dark feelings themselves. After all, if we stick our fingers in our ears and shout “la la la I can’t hear you!” when others are in pain, it’s just one coping technique for helping to deny those feelings in ourselves.

No wonder we’re a society that is addicted to mood-altering substances across the spectrum. We drink, take drugs, smoke and overeat, cocooning ourselves with TV and internet, and fill up credit cards with purchases from infomercials. Where are the connections? I think one reason we find it so hard to connect is that our society tells us to grin and bear it, lest we upset the neighbors.

Expression is painful, messy, and inconvenient. But suppression is infinitely worse.

The simple truth

Aren’t we all just basking in this “new era” of Obama? Isn’t it great? Fantastic, right?

And yet, if Ann Coulter called President Obama a “nigger” on national TV, after a short period of blustering by the national media and a couple thousand more interviews for Ann, she would emerge even more popular than ever. It’s the truth. That’s been the trajectory of her career all along.

We Americans want to taste blood, and we don’t much care where we get it from.

Role models

I remember clearly being in the grocery store just days after Dale Earnhardt had crashed his car in the Daytona 500 and died. There on the magazine rack was a one-off publication with the headline “Dale Earnhardt: American Hero.”

What a crock. Earnhardt drove fast in a sport where people don’t want to watch drivers crash and die – they want to watch drivers crash and walk away. He failed even in that measurement. And to say that endless fast left turns are the criteria for an American hero is, frankly, insulting.

So last night my mother calls me, all upset at Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps for taking a few bong hits. “Doesn’t he know he’s a role model? He should be more responsible than that,” she said, passionately.

Well, in this I have to disagree with her. Michael Phelps wasn’t a role model to anyone, except perhaps people who want to win swimming competitions. He’s an expert in a vanishingly narrow field, with a talent that is never going to advance the course of humanity in any respect. That’s not what makes a role model.

Let him smoke in peace. And let’s buy a sense of perspective as a nation, shall we?

The five stages of Sarah Palin

DENIAL
“I can’t believe they’re doing this. What a stupid pick. Don’t they realize what a boneheaded move this is? I can’t wait for the VP debate.”

ANGER
“They’re getting away with it! Those bastards are going to win again! No one cares about her background, or how her personal narrative is a lie, or how inexperienced she is. Why are people so frackin’ stupid?”

BARGAINING
“Maybe people will wake up and see how shallow and vain and political this pick is. Maybe ‘Troopergate’ and all the rest will matter, once the blush is off the rose. For once – once – maybe voters will be smart about this.”

DEPRESSION
“They’ve fallen backwards into clover again. Those villains are putting up a soccer mom as a shield, and it’s going to work. I hate everything and everyone. I just want to crawl into a hole and die.”

ACCEPTANCE
“If they win, they win. We get the government we deserve, again. Good luck, Sarah.”

At this point, waiting for Sarah Palin’s big speech tonight, I’m currently at “depression.” Which is not a fun stage, let me tell you.

Lacy, gently-wafting curtains

I used to make fun of people who watched “Buffy the Vampire Slayer.” I mean, how stupid, right? But then after “Firefly,” which was brilliant and died way too soon, I thought I should give it a try. I’m glad I did. I haven’t watched the whole series, but I started at the beginning and was continually surprised and impressed. Even the musical episodes were good, even though I generally hate musicals. (I often remember the line from the old ‘Ellen’ show – “I just don’t understand opera. Why do they have to sing everything? Why don’t they just say it?”)

So when I heard that Joss Whedon had been spending his strike-related downtime creating a web series, I knew that I had to check it out.

“Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog” is some of the most entertaining web content I’ve ever seen. All three episodes are online now, but after tomorrow (Sunday) they’ll be gone. I liked it so much that I not only bought the episodes on iTunes, but I’m sure I’ll buy the promised extras-packed DVD.

Neil Patrick Harris (the eponymous Dr.) has left his Doogie days far behind, and it doesn’t hurt that I have a huge crush on Nathan Fillion, who plays Dr. Horrible’s nemesis “Captain Hammer.”

Check this out. Seriously.

Waiting it out

Just finished watching an episode of Morgan Spurlock’s F/X series “30 Days,” where a woman staunchly against gay adoption went to live with a gay couple who had adopted four boys from foster care.

Predictably, the woman, while grudgingly admitting that the men were good parents, didn’t budge an inch from her conviction that children should have a “mom and dad home” and nothing else. If anything she left feeling more strongly against gay adoption, because her beliefs were challenged by the gay couple and their friends, and that just made her defensive and angry.

I’m sure there are still some people in America who, faced with the reality of gay people and their lives, could change their anti-gay stances. But not that many, at this point. Those ships have sailed. For people who believe unconditionally in a holy book and how they were taught to interpret it, the issue begins and ends there. And how can anything compete with that? Spurlock’s show also emphasizes that in most cases, when people’s deeply-held beliefs are challenged, they just become more rigid and dogmatic. Because if you are willing to give up your deeply-held beliefs, what do you have left? It’s a human reaction, if still a sad one.

The truth is that people like the woman in Spurlock’s show won’t ever change – in fact, as they see the world change around them and leave them behind, they’ll probably get more strident. It’s harsh, but all we can do is wait for those people to die out. History is on our side; too bad history takes so damn long.

Thinking in full sentences

Whenever you see someone on TV or in the movies who can read other people’s minds, the subjects always seem to “think” in complete, grammatical sentences. But when was the last time you ever spoke a sentence out in your head? Or even specific words?

I’m thinking a sentence right now. Can you tell what I’m thinking?

No, it doesn’t involve George Clooney. Oh wait. Now I *am* thinking about him.

This is true

On FreeRepublic, where apparently they have nothing better to do, anti-gay trolls have made 180 comments (!) so far on a post about a British commercial for Heinz that shows two men kissing.

Why, whenever I peruse the Freeper’s “HomosexualAgenda” category do I think of “doth protest” and the classic Onion story?

Adventures in near-anonymous web fame

So I e-mailed the staff of Lifehacker after finding an interview in the July issue of Geek magazine (cool, BTW) with Rob Corddry, late of The Daily Show, where he said Lifehacker was da bomb (is that what the kids are saying these days?). They wrote a post on the site about Corddry’s praise, and even were nice enough to end the post with “Thanks, Adam.”

Of course, “Adam” could be Adam West, Adam Carolla, Adam Snavely, Adam Ant, Adam Cartwright, Adam Arkin, or Adam Sandler, among others. And in my haste I didn’t even mention my site or any other way they could credit me – but I wasn’t thinking of that when I sent the e-mail, either. So I don’t expect to be getting any Lifehacker readers coming by here. Still, it’s nice to be mentioned.

In other online fame news, the current top hit when you Google “Adam Blust” is La Shawn Barber’s site. Ack. Although I do feel I did pretty well there, considering the circumstances.